Andromeda, Aliens, and Steamy Bits, Oh My!

[Editor’s note: This article is probably too steamy for a work environment!]

Romance, it’s in the air! Not because it’s spring, but because Mass Effect: Andromeda was released two weeks ago, and I AM IN LOVE.

Sure, I’ll be honest, the guns are great. Space exploration never gets old. There are quests for days, and open world maps that will take days/weeks to explore fully! But, for some of us (ahem, me), we came for the steamy bits—with super hot aliens.

There are several changes in how romance works when you compare the original trilogy with Andromeda.

In the original Mass Effect trilogy: romance worked in a certain order. There was no casual flirting or casual sex. It was a lot of foreplay (almost too much). Which is idealistic, sure! However, not realistic. If you wanted to romance multiple people, you had to spread the love out across three games. And once you locked it in, you were stuck.  Except with Garrus (in Mass Effect 2), because he was about the only realistic option in the game. And sexy to boot.

In Mass Effect: Andromeda: romance is a lot more mature and realistic. There is someone for everyone, and instead of romancing only being about “somewhere down the line,” you now have options for “what I need right now.”

You have light flirting, heavy flirting, friends with benefits, and sexy steamy bits (oh, my!) You don’t have to be nice to make a connection now. There are romance options for all types of personalities (logical, casual, professional, romantic…) You can be kind, or you can be a real jerk. They’ve created a model that recognizes that not everyone is going to like your character and the choices they make.

They instituted this with Dragon Age: Inquisition, but expanded it further with Mass Effect: Andromeda. Good for them!

Now, to the fun stuff—the steamy bits! Eeeee!

Jaal Ama Darav

mass_effect_andromeda_jaal_jfc_is_it_hot_in_here_or_is_it_just_you

… shut up and take me now!

Jaal is an Angaran, and by far my favorite romance in Andromeda!

The Angaran race display their emotions openly and unapologetically. With that said, Jaal doesn’t always act on his emotions, but he will be honest. So should you be, right from the start.

It takes a little bit of work to develop a romantic relationship with Jaal, so you have to be patient. Take the time to further your friendship (choosing the couple icon) and then flirt when prompted. You’ll have to complete his friendship and loyalty missions before you can commit to him.

Before you do, I’d suggest finishing up your hookups with the other characters. Once you go Angaran…no take backsies. Which is fine by me, because this sexy hunk of an alien is worth the commitment!

I kinda wish the romance scenes with Garrus in the last two Mass Effect games were this hot, but better late than never with the sexy alien steamy scene! Good job Bioware! *thumbs up!*

You guys… *peeks through my splayed fingers* Oh, be still my loins…

Grade: A++++

Cora Harper

Cora and Ryder.jpeg

CURVES. FOR. DAYS. AMIRIGHT?! Those hips! Those kisses! The look in their eyes…you guys, this scene…was just…is it hot in here?! *Starts fanning myself*

“Even if it takes me allll night…”  *dies*

Grade: A++

Reyes Vidal

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“You look like you’re waiting for someone.”

What’s interesting about Reyes is that you may or may not encounter him, based on how you play through the game. If you wish to find him (and trust me, YOU WANT TO FIND HIM) he lives on Kadara.

Right from the start, you can engage in flirty banter. He’s quick, witty, sexy to boot….again, trust me, you want to flirt.

If you work together to settle Kadara, you can become very close and kick off a romance. I was not disappointed with him at all, and despite his predictable nature, he can leave you with a couple of good surprises as well that will take your breath away and look at your boyfriend in a “WHY AREN’T YOU THAT SEXY?!” kinda way.

I love him. Love. Love. Love. Love. Him.

Grade: A+

Liam Kosta

Liam Kosta

Liam Kosta is the Kaidan Alenko of Andromeda. Meaning, he’s the default romance option for the female Ryder.  He’s cute, funny, and he understands casual sex. You have the opportunity later in the game to lock it down, or you can hook up and never commit, thus, leaving you free to explore further options.

I’m sorry Liam, but I was left majorly disappointed. Sure, I got all the feels when you and Ryder locked eyes and dived in for that heated first kiss. But a PG hookup on a couch was not enough for me. It was very high school-ish.  No real connection, or steamy scene, whatsoever.

I’ll cherish the memory of watching your muscles during your pushup rep, but, I gotta move on.

Grade: C+

Peebee

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Peebee is a tease, and I love it! From the moment you meet, she has you pinned down to the ground with her legs around you, while flirting suggestively. She doesn’t have much of an interest in romance (although you have the option to commit to her later on). But casual sex in a zero gravity chamber with Peebee was too good to pass up! After lots of flirting back and forth, she finds herself a little hot-headed, desperately needing to relax, so you take a break together in a private escape pod. There you are, just floating, and one flirt leads to another, and before you know it… *sound of banging against metal with mixed moans*  Yeaaa…

I was sad that I didn’t get to see anything suggestive, but the content was pretty steamy in itself!  If you choose not to have sex with Peebee here, you can later on “embrace eternity” if you decide to continue romancing her. The scene is alright, but I enjoyed the zero gravity scene much more.

Grade: B-

Vetra Nyx

Well helllooooo, turian! No joke, I squealed with delight when I first met Vetra. It brought back happy memories of my romance with Garrus Vakarian and his…calibrating. However, unlike my romance with Garrus, Vetra did not do it for me.

She’s fun! Wild! Slow to open up. There’s just not a lot of meat to her romance… *whines*

To lock it down with Vetra, you need to do at least the following flirting:

  1. Choose “you’re intense” when you first chat on the Tempest.
  2. Ask about “anyone special” in a subsequent chat on the Tempest.
  3. Say “I’m here for you both” during Vetra’s loyalty mission.
  4. Tell Vetra you’re “dreaming of someone” after the objective Hunting the Archon.
  5. Check your email for an invitation, then have Vetra in your squad on a Kadara visit.

Grade: D

Gil Brodie

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The engineer! Doesn’t respond to lady Ryder, but definitely has the hots for Scott.

Gil’s a pretty easy relationship to pursue, but it’s not casual. You’re all in, or you’re out. There’s opportunity to flirt, and after a certain point in the main mission, he’ll invite you out on the Nexus to play poker, and later on again where you can declare your intentions publicly to his friend.

The steamy bit is pretty sweet! He’s all cute and vulnerable! He wants complete honesty, and gets all sweet with the “Is it too early to use the ‘L’ word” line. If you return the feelings…his smile will melt your heart!

Grade: B (for pure cuteness)

Suvi Anwar

mass_effect_andromeda_suvi

Uhm… two words: Scottish accent.

Two more words: hellz yea!

Suvi sits opposite of Kallo on the bridge, and is a full romance option. Lots of casual flirting, but no casual sex. If you want to take Suvi to bed, you gotta commit. What I adore about her personality is how mature she is! She’s got a heart for learning. Despite her religious beliefs, she still pursues science because she wants to learn!

No matter your opinion, she’s accepting of both sides and enjoys the healthy debate. After completing the Hunting the Archon mission, Suvi may send you an email inviting you to spend time together. Here’s where you can make or break a relationship.

Grade: C+ (for that Scottish accent, but also because of a lack of anything steamy).

Avela Kjar

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Oh my Gawd, those eyes!!! 0.0

This is a super sweet, quick to the point, casual romance. You encounter Avela on Aya. There’s no commitment, no steamy love scene, but it’s a interesting, heartwarming connection. There are a couple of opportunities to do things for her, and that will only grow your bond.

Grade: C (for cute).

Lexi T’Perro

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The Tempest’s doctor. Simply put, you have no chance. However, Drack and Jaal do. *Sigh* No embracing eternity with this lovely Asarian.

Keri T’Vessa

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Keri is a reporter on the Nexus. After several interviews, and no worry about crossing unprofessional barriers, you can have a casual hookup that won’t damage anything else.

So, that about sums it up. I’d be interested in hearing about who was your favorite romance option and why. OR we can reminisce about the good old Milky Way days (because Garrus Vakarian). Let me know in the comments below!

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